The Maddening Crowd

19 03 2009

Have you ever felt like stick in the mud? Or do you understand the “meerkat” perspective when you are extending your neck above the crowd? Apply the “meerkat” view to Pride and Prejudice, when Mr. Darcy, Mr. Bingley, and Caroline Bingley first enter the ball in Hertfordshire. The entire crowd was facing them and Elizabeth Bennet was singled out in that camera angle.

That was my life last night. Everyone was dancing and lights were invigorating the crowd and the beats traveled from your feet into your heart. It was wasted on me. I should have sold my ticket. I just stood there to the point of exhaustion when I vanished and went home. Typical, really, I always pull a Houdini disappearing act. No sight, no sound, just exit. I had a low-key dinner over Mamacita’s fish taco and veggie taco with Ashley Sue over some tallboy Tecates. Basically, I sabotaged the plans that I had, the plans that were altered and plans that never were, to eat something I eat every week at a place that I always patron. Have a slice of the un-birthday cake! Some point in the night I let a ridiculous thought slip across my mind and wanted to reduce myself to tears. I didn’t break down. I was just absent from my setting. Vapid and vacant.

Today, is just a day. A transient day from now until tomorrow, from here until I’m home and when the salt air heals my soul and bandages my wounds. Each breath provides some sort of uplifting spirits to my present disposition.

Happy Birthday to me.


Talk + The Hardest Part

16 03 2009

Oh brother I can’t, I can’t get through

I’ve been trying hard to reach you because I don’t know what to do

Oh brother I can’t believe it’s true

I’m so scared about the future I wanna talk to you

Oh I wanna talk to you

Everything I know is wrong

Everything I do it just comes undone

And everything is torn apart

Oh and thats the hardest part

coldplay. talk & the hardest part

Stuck in a tough place

16 03 2009

Again, I have hit a point where I am stuck. Stuck in a weird situation, in a place that does not feel like home, with a job I love and adore. But everything can’t be perfect. So I suck it up and say “Thank God I have a job” and hope the rest becomes bearable. Asheville is a place I can enjoy, but living here lacks mental stimulation and anything that is remotely similar to Charleston. I said it, “Charleston is my home and I have come to love it.” I mean I was doing laundry in my complex facility and someone up and jacks my detergent. I am assuming another or the same culprit wanted to use my dryer as well leaving a finicky piece of pink thread to knot all of my clothes together and thus rendering them wet. I mean I am cutting thread in over 12 places that has 20 items in the most awful fashion connected to each other. I was not missing thread from any of my clothing. So imagine my despair on a Saturday night cutting pieces of pink fuzzy wuzzy from a huge ball containing articles of my clothing.

Sinester Fuzzy Wuzzy

Can anyone feel me?

The most disappointing day of work, everrr.

5 03 2009
I feel small, and on the verge of tears.

I feel small, and on the verge of tears.

Today, I let myself down. Down so hard I feel like I let everyone else down.

The situation: I was coordinating a media event yesterday at the Rayburn Building in Washington DC. Students and teachers made up a delegation that were presenting to legislators on The Hill with instructional classroom technology. Exciting tools for the 21st Century classroom that are supported in the education stimulus. Hosted by Congressman Jack Kingston’s office, these students had ongoing presentation in 5 stations in the lobby of the Rayburn. I had invited education publications, major print news outlets, local broadcast news stations, all the way up to Fox News and CNN.

The problem: Nobody could confirm because if you have not noticed there is a shortage of staffing everywhere. Journalists are up to their noses in assignments and news tips that breeze by their desk daily. There is no relief and thus a really great story was sidelined by whatever headlines are on the stands today. Apparently, I was informed that a Prime Minister was in attendance.

In hindsight: I felt like I performed to the best of my ability given the timeliness that this event was presented to my inbox. I had 1 week to pitch this story and it takes me a 1/2 day to scouring the internet for relevant contacts that would best cover the beat of this story. I usually have 3-4 wks to prepare for an event, but I rolled with the punches. I am more aware to develop more creative ways to garner attention around the stories I pitch for our clients and explore unconventional outlets when I feel like my story is not being well-received.

I will admit; however, that I was riding on a high from pitching a regional event in Nashville from the day before. I managed to snag two news stations and The Tennessean. My tactics tend to work for a smaller media market, now I need to manifest those skills into the larger playing field. DC is a hot bed for information. I need to hone my skills to capture the attention of the district. I thought personalized pitches would be well-received. I obviously have more learning to do. I would love to hear any advice of comments about breaking into a major media market. Today I will work on follow-up stories in Georgia and I hope I can put something together on AP newswire in Atlanta. I will also try to force my hand for post-event interviews with the delegation that travelled to DC. I have my work cut out for me if I am going to earn redemption, just in my own eyes.

I am so thankful for good friends who promptly checked in on my and the tweet-love from my colleagues. I am even more thankful that I am harder on myself than anyone else I work with because I don’t think I could take the scrutiny. I’ll let you know how it goes at the end of the month, I have an event in Memphis and an America’s Promise event– I am just praying I don’t screw up for Colin Powell!